Twitchy, The Adventures of. Episode 4
“Open Eyes I SAY, Open Eyes, I SAY… NOW!” yelled the creature to Bear as he flew down to a lower branch right above Bear.
Bear was lying very still almost comatose on the ground. He did not appear to be alive.
(BIG BIG PAUSE)
BUT
Bear had landed in a mess of dirt and leaves. And being… well… rather… well stuffed, he was unharmed.
Bear opened his eyes. Almost one would say as directed, upon which he saw the creature.
“Twitch! Twitch! Look!” said Bear
Twitchy indeed was awoken by the fall. But upon hearing the name “Twitch” he became quite annoyed.
(Twitchy doesn’t change his expression)
Twitchy abhorred being called Twitch. I mean, really, after all, his name was not so long that it needed to be shortened in such a fashion. He remembered he once saw a programme where a man came out of a cave in the woods and after being asked his name he said there were some… who called him… Tim. Now surely, this was short for Timothy he thought, which was a perfectly acceptable name. Why shorten it to …Tim! And he was just about to mind-talk to Bear his displeasure with the name situation when he heard…
“ Humpfh(Grunted), You OK! Hmmm! Hmmm? Good! Good! Now GO”
Hearing this, Twitchy thought, my goodness how rude. Shouldn’t this creature have at least inquired about the well-being of Bear first? After all, Bear could have been hurt. This was unacceptable! Unacceptable! But before Twitchy could mind-talk this to the creature, it started to laugh pointing at… Twitchy.
Please tell me what is so humorous? Twitchy mind-talked to the creature.
Look at you! Ridiculous. Who wears such coat and such hat. Ridiculous. I can’t believe. I CAN’T BELIEVE!! The creature said as he just laughed and laughed, and flew around in circles and laughed and laughed some more.
“What name you? Hmmm! Hmmm?” asked the creature.
Twitchy was … well… stunned.
(Twitchy doesn’t change his expression)
What manner of creature was this anyway Twitchy thought. And then he remembered he once saw a programme where a man with a most wonderful voice, (not unlike his own in fact now that he thought about it) was quite fond of talking about nature and wildlife and all the species and what not within it. It was several programmes actually, what one would call a series? And one of them introduced birds. And if Twitchy was correct (which of course he always was) this species of bird was called… a Cardinal.
First, it is quite rude to laugh at someone’s expense, Twitchy mind-talked to the Cardinal. Second, as I was instilled with manners which it seems you were not, I will tell you my name is Twitchy. And yours… Cardinal?
“Cardinal? what is this thing you say, Cardinal. Humph(Grunted), My name not Cardinal. Who Cardinal?”
Upon which Bear exclaimed. “What’s… what’s a Cardinal Twitchy? I thought he was just a bird. A very mean one at that brother. He pecked my fingers and made me fall.”
And I believe you owe my companion an apology. Twitchy mind-talked quite sternly to the cardinal.
“Yeah, yeah said Bear. That’s right. Hey Twitchy, what’s an apology?”
Twitchy – being a rabbit of few words – just sighed.
(Twitchy doesn’t change his expression… or… voice)
“Bear in my tree, my forest, mine, everything mine. everything MINE! I say go, he don’t listen, so DONE! Humpfh(Grunted). Besides look, look he fine, no problem, no problem see? So what fuss? Hmmm! Hmmm?”
What an odd bird Twitchy thought. Does he not know what a verb is or even how to conjugate one? And look at those boots! Why would he wear such a thing? Besides he could fly, why wear boots that are obviously too big for his body. But Twitchy wasn’t one to judge.
“Ah, I see you look at boots! Yes, very good these boots, very nice, Good leather, no EXCELLENT leather. I say so. Done. Humpfh(Grunted), and my name, well, my name… Me.”
Me? Twitchy mind-talked
“Me, me?” said Bear
“No, Me” said cardinal. “Just Me”
“Who who is me?” said Bear
“I am Me” said cardinal
“You, you, are me? You can’t be me, I am me. Aren’t I me Twitchy” said Bear.
“No, I Me, Me! Me! Me! – I Me!” the cardinal was getting quite frustrated
Enough!
Twitchy said. This was all so tiring and he had just had a nap! Such bother.
Bear… Twitchy mind-talked, this cardinal’s name is Me. An odd name for a cardinal, granted, but nevertheless, his name is Me.
“This what I say. I say Me. Your companion, Humpfh (Grunted), is not too smart. Humpfh (Grunted)! Anyway, why you here? And why you have such ridiculous hat.”
One could say, Twitchy mind-talked. You have ridiculous boots, especially for a bird. And you have quite an odd way of speaking. Did you not study grammar in school? Do you not know how to conjugate a sentence properly? Did you even go to school? It appears not. Anyway, I have not the time or patience for this any longer. Bear, please fetch your shirt so we can be on our way.
Bear began climbing the tree. But his fingers hurt from the pecking that the cardinal… pardon… Me, gave him.
“I don’t I don’t think I can,” said Bear. “My fingers hurt terribly. I’m sorry Twitchy” Bear felt very very bad.
Well, there’s nothing to be done for it then. Let’s go. Twitchy mind-talked.
“But but it’s my favorite and my ONLY shirt. What am I going to do?” Bear plopped down to the ground and began to cry.
Twitchy hated public displays of emotion and appeared most uncomfortable at this outburst.
(Twitchy doesn’t change his expression)
But before Twitchy could say anything, Me, flew up retrieved the shirt and dropped it onto Bear’s head.
“Humpfh(Grunted), here’s shirt, done, Hmmm! Hmmm? Now GO! Go! Humpfh(Grunted)”
Twitchy could not be happier to depart this place and get away from this rude bird called… Me.
Very well then Bear, you have your shirt and I presume it is dry enough? Twitchy mind-talked. So please be so kind as to put it on and we’ll be off.
And with that Twitchy turned around and started walking away.
Bear obediently puts his shirt on and waddled close behind.
But as they walked away, Bear could have sworn he saw a speck of red fly by, just out of the corner of his eye.
TBC (To Be Continued…)